As a blogger I am fortunate to have a number of folks’ who talk to me about what I write. This is one of their stories.
This blog may well reach out to many of us who have had those moments when we had to decide Truth or Secret. This may be YOUR STORY TOO…
- Which can you cope with?
- What do you REALLY want to KNOW?
- If we knew could we ever FORGET?
- If we knew could we ever FORGIVE?
- Would it make us STRONGER?
- Would it make us WEAKER?
- Would it destroy who we ARE?
- Would it define our CHARCTER for BETTER or WORSE?
Life has given all of us this CROSS ROAD and yet many of us HIDE truth and SECRET away for it is easier not to DEAL with REALITY.
Sometimes, we believe that not knowing is better than dealing with the the REALITY of TRUTH.
And yet…… those who don’t want to know will always remember… LINGERING DOUBTS LAST A LIFE TIME….
Do we REALLY believe that not KNOWING is the coping mechanism of LIFE?
Sometimes TRUTH is to damn HARD to cope with and too HURTFUL that we may never RETURN to who we ARE.
Sometimes the SECRET we keep is all the TRUTH we need and KNOW that the TWISTS and BENDS of life MAKES us WHO WE ARE!
The TRUTH is we all HAVE SECRETS the question is has HOW DID IT MAKE US BETTER PEOPLE…. Did it BUILD us or DIMINISH us?
Dedicated to all those who went through that dark tunnel! Thanks for sharing the journey.
Many conversations start with a question!
How are you? How have you been? What have you been up to? And so on.
How did you feel when you were asked the questions? Did you feel like Oh Jeeze no!
We have all been there particularly when things have not been going so well. We have all had those moments…some moments lasting longer than others..
How do those moments change us? Have we become more than one person?
Different with different people…
I come across many people who tell me they are different people when they are at home than when they are at work.
Its not surprising to hear this I hear you say. Many of us show up differently given different circumstances.
The problem is who are we really?
The Questions of Faith and Fear
How do we show up each day?
What do we want to show and importantly what do we want to hide?
What do we want people to think of us?
What are we afraid of if we really show who we are?
Scorecards are life cards!
The thing is from the moment we were born we had a scorecard…how heavy, how long. What color eyes…… and so on.
It continued through infancy through to schools and sports, what were we good at what did we suck at!!
Remember first impressions and lasting impressions?
Life is a scorecard and yet when we get to work we are often different, we give lesser of ourselves and to our co-workers in many cases much less and yet…..
Work and Life
Productivity -Be the best you can be
Attendance -Be punctual when meeting friends
Quality -Be present and attentive
Safety -Do no harm to others – build relationships
Discipline -Fairness and honesty – Always
You see the thing is that each defines you and they cannot be separated:
Are all ONE and the only thing you have to decide is whether faith of fear separates the REAL you from showing up.
HRMexplorer November 1st 2014
Picture courtesy of
Part of The 4 stages of leadership – see my link http://wp.me/pTp83-lN
This blog is about the 6 phases of relationships and follows under Personal Reflection in my 4 stages of leadership model.
Phase 1 – Relationship with me! – Realization.
- What kind of relationship do I want to have with myself?
- Do I like who I am?
- Am I positive or negative in what I see or do?
- Do I even like ME and is this who I always want to be?
- Am I stuck in my own emotions and do I want to change?
- Do I know what I want from myself?
- Is the present person I am harming others?
Develop the vision of who you want to be.
Phase 2 – Relationships with my community – my Mask.
- Do people feel positively or negatively towards me?
- What do they see in my actions and behaviors?
- Does a different part of me come out when I am in my community of family, friends, coworkers and community?
- Do I even let them into my world or do I keep them out?
- Do they believe or trust me?
- Do I even trust myself?
- Do they want to be with me? – Do I want to be with me?
- Start to seek out others to define existing and future reality of who I need and want to be. Indeed is there a positive future if I do not seek help from others?
Develop oneness – get rid of different masks– look for support.
Phase 3 – Attraction – develop the person you like and need to become.
- Give yourself permission that it’s possible to be different.
- Release the chains that hold you in the past and move to the community that will help you move to your vision.
- Find the communities you need to be part off and seek help and develop new relationships that are trusting and supportive.
- Develop faith over fear for the change that is needed and yet to come.
Change is not the option the only option is whether you have the courage to choose it.
Phase 4 – Lets Hang out – Staying with your new community.
- Continue to develop the “likeability” and goodness factor.
- Hang out with people who engage and promote the person you have always wanted to become (and needed to become.)
- Be with people who support and reinforce who you are becoming.
- Start to behave not how others expect you but how you need to develop the new you.
Define your character based, not on what others expect you too, but in the knowledge that you are accountable for your own actions.
Phase 5 – Developing Awesomeness.
- Continue to develop and sustain your character through higher levels of trusting relationships.
- Remember that by becoming awesome you develop an ever-increasing community that sustains lifelong relationships.
- Reestablish relationships with those love ones that were harmed
- Know that by becoming awesome your actions will start to serve others and not yourself.
The first stage of servant leadership.
Phase 6 – SuperAwsome.
- Become a champion of memorable relationships.
- Share your experiences with others so that they can also be inspired.
The path to developing leadership in others.
At this time of year when we take time out for the holiday season it is often a time when we reflect on… memories of yesteryear.
Memories of life long ago, of the good times and the struggles.
It makes no difference how old we are.
Of people we met and those that we lost.
Of dreams we had and intentions and determinations.
Of hopes and desires.
Life is not something that we can ever determine no matter how hard we plan.
Life is for the living and never for the winning.
Life makes us who we are.
No matter who we are or what has become of us.
Whatever happened along the way will remain with us forever.
Memories are forever.
Memories deliver the moments that seem it was just like yesterday